Blossoming

Lan Lan and Mei Mei had their ballet recital.  It was beautiful! 

It is always emotional for me to see how far my girls have come. 

Two girls who were once denied so much, yet are now blossoming before our very eyes.

Mei Mei didn't love ballet (she especially didn't like having her hair put up every week!), but it was so good for her, in so many ways, and we had her complete the year.  She enjoyed performing as Red Ridinghood in the recital.

Lan Lan always dreamed of becoming a dancer and she loves it!  She starts pre-point next year and is SO excited to start wearing toe shoes!  She was a Russian dancer for the performance--can't you just see her glow? 

Feeling grateful remembering this special day, feeling grateful for two very special daughters who bring so much light and life to our family! 

What's Next?

Oh me, oh my!  Coming up for air!  I completed my final term paper last night.  I'm too old for this college stuff!

I am SOOO looking forward to spring break.  I desperately want some down time with my kids!   I want to spend time with my dad and mom!  I want to spend time with my husband!

At the Temple of Heaven in Beijing 

Since I only have one term left (PTL!) people have been asking me (and asking me) what I plan to do after graduation.  Honestly, I'm not sure!  Maybe become a hobo???

(Wait.  "Hobo" is not a word a social worker should be using.  Did I really just say that?  What I meant to say was employment-seeking-wanderlusting-free-spirited-human-being.)

I know I'll work in child welfare or adoption, but want to work part-time or at least flex some hours from home.  With international adoption slowing down, there's not as much available.  With the State, there's not a lot of part-time opportunities.  Private agencies?  Non-profits?

Lan Lan on a very cold day . . .

It's enough to cause my stress-o-meter to start ratcheting up.  Which I've been doing.  Which doesn't help.  And it's not like I don't have enough to stress about already, ya know?

So at this point, I'm just trying to let it go, and trust that God will put me right where He needs me the most!

finding a ladybug!  A sign of good luck!  

And if He decides that won't be until after summer vacation, I'm good with that!

Back-To-School Underpants

The day has been filled with back-to-school shopping.  It's that time of year and I'm kicking and screaming all the way!  I love summer!  And I hate shopping!  (I actually wouldn't mind shopping quite so much if it didn't take SO MUCH time and money!)

I did find Kim a special article of clothing for back-to-school. 

Squirrel Underpants

FYI her nickname is "Squirrel!"

My kids are anxiously anticipating the letters in the mail to find out who their teachers will be.  We have been so blessed by the teachers at our school!

Last year Lan Lan's teacher sent the following magnet home which has been hanging on our fridge:

"Of all the things I could ever teach you, there are three that I feel are the most important in life.  'Be kind, loving to one another, and forgiving of each other."  Love, Mrs. M. -- 6th Grade

I love that teachers teach so much more than academics.  We love the teachers in our kids' lives--just wish summer was a few months longer!  And wish I had a personal shopper for all my kids' back-to-school needs--but I'm guessing then I wouldn't get to laugh about squirrel underpants!

Missing Joe

August 3, 2007.  The day we lost our son.

 

Sometimes the day leers at me for weeks ahead of time and sometimes it sneaks up quickly, like this year.  Regardless, it's always a day that takes my breath away with deep sadness, one that brings back the devastation of memories--a pit so filled with grief I thought I wouldn't survive. 

It's also filled with wonderful memories of our sweet Joe, a child FULL of life and love!  Joe was always a hugger--even when he grew to almost six feet tall, he would give me the biggest and longest hugs!  And he was always so full of humor and fun!  Oh, the stories we can tell!

Dressing up for the Boys Rooting Association

One thought that keeps occurring to me this year is how much grief our newly adopted kids experience over the loss of their brother.  Vu, Lan Lan, and Mei Mei never met Joe, and yet they know they've lost an integral part of their family.  They grieve the loss of never having met him and often ask questions about what he was like.  Sometimes, especially at night, they cry for the brother they never met.  They know someone's missing from our family.  Joe LOVED kids and would have adored each and every child added to the family.  His absence is always felt.

We often talk about how exciting it will be when they finally get to meet him in heaven.  Nirvana.  We like to imagine all the fun he is having in heaven, playing baseball everyday, sharing giant Butterfinger Blizzards with Jesus, and giving piggyback rides to all the kids. 

As wonderful as we can imagine heaven must be, we selfishly wish he was still here with us. 

When we were at Disneyland we went on all of Joe's favorite rides--Splash Mountain, Space Mountain, all the fast rides and fun places.

 James, Joe, and Will Disneyland - 1993

 

And when we went to the Star Wars store Mei Mei kept asking me about Joe--if that was his favorite store and if I remembered things he bought there?  Mei Mei was fascinated with the idea that Joe was once there.  She was also fascinated with the build-your-own-lightsaber and ended up buying one with hard-earned money--of course, the lightsabers brought back happy memories for the little boys too, and all three decided that was the perfect way to spend their money.

Joe would be so proud. 

We love you Joe!  We miss you.  You are loved and missed even by your siblings who haven't yet met you!  Never to be forgotten and always looking forward to the day we are all together again! 

We saw this brilliant double rainbow on our way to Disneyland.  We felt like Joe was smiling down on us.  It went clear across the sky and all the way down on both sides.  Amazing!

 

The Doctor Is In

Last night, during bedtime stories, Lan Lan became upset about a sibling taking her seat and she stomped out of the room. 

Patrick looked up at me, shrugged his shoulders, then stated nonchalantly, "Well Mom, I guess that puberty video we saw in school is true.  It said that between the ages of eleven and nineteen kids can become extra emotional."

This kid makes me laugh!

Looking For A Bilingual Bow Shop?

Last year our school hosted a Vietnamese Culture Club.

How cool is that?  We are blessed to live in a diverse community.

Patrick, Lan Lan and Vu happily participated in the language and culture lessons.  We were told that Patrick has an amazing ear for language. 

This year, when Lan Lan returned to Saturday Chinese School, Patrick decided to join in too.

Sidenote:  Patrick probably decided to join because he knew it would mean exclusion from Hour of Power chores (a nice bonus for having to spend Saturday morning in school).  He also thought it occurred during church--not sure how the mis-communication occurred, but I can assure you he wasn't so gung-ho about Chinese school when he discovered the truth.

Last week was the first day.  Patrick was excited about it before class. 

Afterward?  Not so much.  Not so much at all.  He didn't like being the only kid who wasn't Asian and the only one who didn't speak at least a little Chinese (welcome to the world our newly adopted kids live in daily!).

As the next Saturday approached, he became more and more apprehensive.  He wanted to drop the class.  He didn't want to go.  He didn't want to learn Chinese. 

Here is what he said as we were driving in the car. 

"Mom, I know you said that learning Chinese will help me get a job someday, but I've been thinking about it and I don't think that's true.  You might not know this, but I want to work in a bow 'n arrow shop someday (last I knew he was planning on becoming President of the United States while simultaneously working at a video game store), and really mom?  How many people do you think I'm going to get in my shop who are looking to buy a bow 'n arrow and only speak Mandarin?"

I have to admit.  The kid's got a point.

I still made him go to Chinese school. 

I'm happy to report that class two felt much more comfortable and even enjoyable. 

Forever And Always

What a special day!  We completed Lan Lan's US adoption. 

She now has her official American name and will be issued an American birth certificate with our names as her parents.  I love the judge who officiates.  She does a mock trial with all the kids and explains history regarding the courts and legal system. 

The best part was when the judge asked Lan Lan if she understood how long she would be in our family.  Lan Lan said, "For one year.  And until I get old and die."

And the judge said, "And even longer than that--forever and always."

Sweet words.

Some people think it is too late for older children to be adopted.  Especially kids who have always been waiting.  And waiting.  Some think kids who have experienced a harsh life will never overcome the effects.



referral picture in 2010



Those people don't know Lan Lan.  She is one of the sweetest, most loving children in the whole world!  She is determined and loves to try new things.  She is musical, artistic, athletic, opinionated, kind, optimistic, sassy, stylish, thoughtful . . . and did I mention beautiful? 

Forever and always.

I love those words. 

How blessed we are.